I used to enjoy scrolling LinkedIn. Reading about people's roles, their climb up the corporate ladder, or the step stool they were building toward their own startup.

But I have a hard time scrolling it now. It's full of hyper-inflation on the most basic things. Yes, it's a social network. Socializing is not what's happening there.

The layoff speech, every time

There's one pattern I see over and over. Somebody gets let go. Fired, reorganized, laid off after 10, 15, 20 years of dedication to a role and a company. And instead of saying, this sucks, this happened, I'm looking for a new role, they get up and give a podium speech.

Paragraphs, usually AI-written, about how much they've gained, how much they valued the team, how great their impact was during their time there. All of which may be true. Then it ends with: "If you have any leads on roles that might be a fit, let's talk."

I dislike that. Not because those things aren't true. Because it rarely makes room for the other feelings underneath: loss, fear, frustration.

I understand being optimistic. I understand only saying the good things, because you don't want a future employer scrolling your page and finding you snarky or upset about being let go. I get that.

But you're a human being. For many of us, day-to-day life depends on that paycheck landing on time. You put years into a company, they let you go, often without warning, and now you have to figure it out in the job market that exists right now.

And you're supposed to get on here and pontificate like it was a blessing? Thank them for the opportunity that blindsided you?

No, because that's not the whole of what you feel. And pretending it is paints a weird, robotic picture.

This is probably my pessimistic brain talking. I'm usually the one looking for the silver lining, for myself and for other people, no matter the situation. But the pessimist in me says: you don't feel that. So why get on here and speak to only one part of your range of feelings?

What honesty would sound like

Why is it wrong to say: "I'm looking for a new role. I was devastated by an unforeseen layoff, and it sucks, but I'm ready for the next thing, because these bills don't stop and I'm ready to add value elsewhere."

That feels a lot more real than three paragraphs of gratitude for the opportunity that blindsided you.

Every social platform has its own culture, its own bylaws, written or unwritten. LinkedIn shouldn't turn into Facebook, I'm not saying that. But it makes it hard for people who value genuine interaction. People who value someone's actual emotion, opinion, or idea.

Being a little saddened, shocked, or disappointed in a role or a company's decision should be able to sit there without being treated like a strike against you. Because we're human. Not every setback needs to become a motivational speech. Not every disappointment needs to turn into a lesson in gratitude before you've even had a chance to process what happened.

Sometimes something sucks. Sometimes you're disappointed. Sometimes you need a job, and there doesn't have to be a beautifully packaged story wrapped around it.

The performance we've all agreed to

That's what makes LinkedIn hard to interact with, for me. After a while, I start wondering whether people really believe this is how human beings are supposed to talk to each other, or whether everyone already knows it's a performance, and we've all just agreed to keep performing.

- Kan